I found I had time for a run yesterday and was so thankful for this much needed time to be alone and reflect. The weather was perfect, wisps of clouds and 70 degree weather. As I tuned out the world, watched the birds and rabbits, listened to my favorite tunes, my mind was able to reflect on these past 4 years of waiting for Lauren. The highs and lows, the doubts, patiently listening to strangers give their advice, the inspiration of friends and family, the friendships I have found on the way...the realization washed over me that we are next. Next to recieve our referral, next to see Lauren's sweet face.
My mind at times wandered also to how against all common sense our move is. At a time where the economy is faltering, people are losing their jobs... at a time that we should be saving...we are about to deplete our savings account and go to China. God reminded me at this time, of his clear signs he gave us at the beginning that seem so long ago now. The drive home from our Memorial Day camping trip in 2005, the night drive to San Diego a few months later, where Dan and I got chills the sign was so clear. The sign that we were to walk in faith and start the process of adopting our Lauren.
Well, little did I know I would be recieving another sign at the end of my run. As my mind swayed between doubt and excitement, I noticed school was just letting out as I ran by. Dollar signs, calculations, thoughts of my uncle who just lost his job were swarming my mind and then the sign...
A little 4-year-old Chinese girl with long black hair, pink pants and a flowered top came running right toward me with her arms stretched out..running as fast as she could with a huge smile on her face and looking what seemed to be directly at me. As she got closer I could hear her voice over my music saying, "Mommy!!" My heart dropped and tears almost sprang up. In seconds she ran just past me to her mom that was just behind me. I instantly looked up to the sky and knew God was giving me a glimpse into my future and letting me know, it will all be worth the wait and that God is in control. I will never forget these signs from God. He has been amazing over these years.
Thank you all who have followed our journey to Lauren. Please know you will be the first to know when I have seen her face. :)
I love all of you and am so thankful for your encouragement, letters, cards, friendships, encouraging words, and most of all for your Faith.
